Tuesday, May 09, 2006

tragedy is relative - andrew

today i was walking through the halls of the office after having spoken with my boss about a very pressing matter.

i had just filled a white plastic cup with free animal crackers from a large plastic bucket that sits atop one of the tables in the kitchen and i was walking back towards my desk thinking about shaders and normal maps and artists' unions and poly counts.

the day had thus far gone swimmingly - no fender benders, no milestones, no dropped quarters, no waking up on the wrong side of the bed. if the sky had shown through the office roof, it would have been a bright bright blue and little birds would have rested at the edge of my vision singing sweet melodies while the sun waved and offered me two scoops of raisin bran, or whatever the hell the sun is supposed to offer you...

such a good day.

i should have known better. on my best days - too my worst tragedies.

i bit into a cookie, i think he was a hippo, sideways and vertically, so that his head was just under my two front teeth and his tail and ass rested on the crest of my lower teeth. like a tin soldier to face his sweet end, posed and perfect, unwavering and emotionless - his brittle body stood rigid for a moment just before shatering into several tiny pieces collecting in my mouth. This was fine.

However, i was not prepared for the light dust of animal cracker that blew out from the hippo's collapse; right as i was passing by Hethe and Shelly's office door the dust blew up and back on a wisp of the wind.

Small broken animal pieces entered the moist whites of my eyes and clouded my vision for just a moment, stinging and stinging and stinging while congealing and stinging my eyes.

Instantly ruined, I nearly fell to the ground, taken down by a single small hippo cookie. My entire universe collapsing in on itself to the black hole of hippo bits and star dust eye irritant.

ok ok ok. i'm going to stop now.

it wasn't that bad, but i felt like writing some drama into the blog today and for practical intent and purpose - it did go down like that. i do like me some weird food tragedy stories.

take care and do sleep well.

"el risk"



Shelly Wan said...

no shame to be taken by a hippo; no shame at all.

this has got to be one of my favorite characters! love his lips. ^0^

weezie said...

Snack foods are dangerous. I told you about the time when I dislocated my jaw on a Pringle, right?

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